30th day

Same like other day, I wake up at 4 o' clock. I was thinking of meeting her at college in the morning to tell her sorry for my wrong thinking and words which i have said and hurt her.

But, she had said yesterday that she will come at her time, i had forget that so keep on waiting her but the college bell gone so i went to my class with sad face :( I had forgot that

she will come late so had become sad and while meeting her at break my face was still sad though i had something to say so due to this she became angry, and went to her class. I was again

flopped because of my own behavior. I tried to make conversation with her but was so confused how to make her feel that i have felt sorry because of my own behavior so any how i had to talk

with her and tried. I settled the talk and returned home. My plan to give her surprise on saturday by taking her had also flopped. I had only just reached home when my mother left home for check up of her leg so i was saved today because i had reached home around 2 which was late.

I completed my word and called her at around half past two and read for my tomorrow's re-exam of economic which i became fail with 38 marks where 40 was pass mark and i was feeling angry with my

economic sir. I read and while reading i slept with book open and window too so i wake up at around 1 am due to cold and wrote this diary.....so my day was average....:)

29th day

Today, again i cried. I had told her that i will tell her tomorrow the thing which i had to tell her, i had mistakely told her unknowingly. I knew some misunderstand or something else will happen if i will say that in phone. But when i told her that i will tell tomorrow then she was upset an little bit angry, at that time i remembered one moment when i had told her that i will not tell that thing, that time she had asked me with more curocity than other thing which i hadn't known. she said me not to tell anything.. I was feeling sorry so i told her and due to this she said me not to think what i was thinking and not to touch her, but after she said that all, she thought that i am again hurt because of her. Yes i was hurt but not what she told, but because of how she told me....I really felt bad. Today also she said that she want break up...I was afraid to lose her and her heart. I settled that talk. I was out of my mind so i wrote this diary to feel good and slept around half past 7....The day was started with joys and ended with sorrows...........

28th day

We can't say that the person who seems happy have a happy life because he/she may not be happy in some sad, difficult, journey of life. So, don't judge the person by seeing his/her few moments which you have seen coz he/she may be pretending to be so. Its like that for me too but not exactly the same. Nowdays, I havenot reached home before half past twelve, so, i get scold at home. I don't know how, but I always miss my college bus to return home. Its surprising to me to know that I wake up so earlier that my college bus willn't be missed coz i always remember her and want to meet her. Study!, It is there always but actually when i wake up, i always take her name and i feel so good that i am going college though i go to college daily...... Today, i had went to one of my friends home. I was in deep thought about my relationship that what is going on, and how?, how am i spending my days.... At night also, i was not able to sleep so i had tried to call her, but, her phoned was switched off. I am feeling sleepy, so, Good night friends, My today was not so good than i had thought it would be..:)

27th day

Today, It was my result of 1st terminal examination of grade 12. I got my result better that i had, i was shocked but i am happy that i have got one subject below pass marks. After each i tell myself that i will now progress my study by giving maximum time but due to household works, my unstable mind, it never happens. so, I think that and laugh whenever i have that thinking in my mind. Its amazing, funny etc etc...
Today, i gave continuous miscall to her, and her mobile was switched off. I think she became disturbed by it.
In the evening, i cooked food because my mum is injured so she is taking rest and my sister can't do that. so, after cooking food, i started to work which i had left to go to take my result. I finished that worked, ironed my dress and ate food. Then after i watched one movie which i had copied in my laptop. I finished that movie around 11 PM and i slept by keeping alarm of 04:00 AM because i am not sure of my own sleeping time. Sometime i sleep less than 6 hours and sometime more than. So good night.............:-)...

26th day

I share my words with my friends, family, but specially with my sister with whom i always fight and quarrel a lot at my home. She is my one and only sister with whom i share maximum things and feeling of mine. I share with my friend also. I have something to share with you reader too that-"DON'T MAKE A MISTAKE DUE TO WHICH YOU WILLN'T BE TRUSTED".
I share with my mom also. Whenever i have something new things in my mind, something that have made me happy, something that have made me sad, I always want to share it with someone. But specially i want to share with my beloved one and i do also. Sometime while sharing my feelings and thoughts, i have hurt her and due to that, i had told her that i am feeling bad because of sharing her that thing, and she said that i don't think her mine so she asked me to leave..I was again hit by my own words so badly............

25th day

I always want to talk with her but due to some reason i always became sad but why, i don't know. I like to spend time with her whenever i can manage time. So, in college, we talk, and while returning home, i go to leave her to her home though i become late to reach to my home and while waiting bus, we talk and share our words. It is said that those who do true love, they shouldn't give rings, handkerchief, etc etc, so i didn't, but i had wanted to give her one ring.
While going to leave her home, many relative of mine have saw me with her so they tell me that she is nice but don't go like that more, otherwise something bad may happen. I also think for sometime but after college over, i forget that thing coz i want to go with her. I love to spend time with her. I don't care other. I love her so much and i think she also do but she doesn't show! But whenever she does something, for me, I really feel so happy. I always pray to god to make our relation strong.
I use to be sad and sometime i use to be angry with her but she thinks that i am hurt by her. Yes, she hurt me, but not every time. In love it happens, but I am really happy to be with her. She keeps on telling me to increase my height, i also tell my mom to take me to checkup for eating calcium but its too late for eating calcium, But, doctor have told me that i can still grow but not so much. So, i can't be as tall as she had wanted me to be. I am sorry for that...........

24th day

I like to chat with friends so i used facebook and mig33 and by using them i use to entertain myself and while i was bored, i used to use them so it became habit of using them. I use them in my laptop which was bought for my computer course which i needed from 11. I play games, but most of time i use to listen music. I used to use though i hadn't joined internet facilities in my home but now without internet. i don't like to use computers except for listening music and for some project works.

23th day

I like to play football. I used to go to play football with my friends of village in B.P.Sangralaye's playground. We practice football there everyday around 04:00 pm.
So, we had held tournament and today, was the final day of tournament. Our village
had 5 football team and team A and team B of my village had entered in final and i
was in team B. Team A won the game and we were cheering our village. We were happy.

22th day

Today, i am so sad and feeling bored. She asked me to leave her because she
thought that i didn't think her mine and she always make me feel embarrassed
which is not true. We were chatting on Mig and due to misunderstanding, it
happened. I don't want to make her feel like that. She asked me to leave but
i can't be happy without her coz since she replied me "YES", my life was running nicely and don't wanna lose her..... Next day i called her though i had no time
coz my dad had called some of guest and i had to help. I called and asked sorry
and settle our problem and that week our football tournament was going on. That
day was very hard to spend for me and i will never want to repeat that day again...

21th day

My day are going so interesting. I used to write small small poem.
Everyday in class and at home, I used to think and write a lot of poems.
All those thoughts and feelings which i have, that i used to pour in my poems.

In my grade 11 also, when my computer teacher gave me project of html, i made
one site of using my own poems.

20th day

I am so happy. My study started to improve and my mind always keeps on remembering
her and my heart was so happy to have a friend and be 2 heart, because i had two
two eyes, i had two ears and now i have two heart. I don't want let it be alone now,
so please god! don't take away my happiness. It's my life which i have to make delightful and my relationship will last forever............
-Racheet Shrestha

19th day

"Excess of everything is dangerous"
so due to this i was afraid to tell my girl that i love her so much that i can't express that feelings which i have towards her.
But one day i forced her to accept my proposal because she was broken by someone so she was out of that thinking and also had said
that she don't want to make such relation with anyone from now onwards coz she was afraid to broke her heart once again.
she also had said me that-'I have no such feelings to you". I was totally depressed by her but also i tried and said her to trust me only once,
make relation wid me and lets see what will happen.
If after that also no feelings come to you for me then you can do anything you want. I told her like that.
I told everything which i have for her.
And after some minute i called her back and asked her and she replied "YES"........